Performance anxiety

Animisha It is interesting, because you'll play with a pounding heart. However, what if you mess up badly in that situation? Would it make matters worse?

I don’t think so. The idea is to experience playing despite the physical reactions.

In my experience, when I’ve had a performance that hasn’t gone well due to nerves and shaking hands, and then had another performance soon after, the second one always goes better. This happened to me last November, when I played in the (mostly kids) recital held by my piano school, and then two weeks later I played at the concert at the retirement center.

These two performances where the first time I’d played in a truly public recital since before the pandemic. And even though I’ve played publicly a lot, I somehow don’t retain the feeling of shaky hands very long, so the first recital, I just couldn’t get control of my shaky hands. For the second one, I think I was just less surprised by the feeling.

So back to your question, @Animisha , I would think that the thing to do would be to do the “pounding heart” practice more than once, not in the same practice session, but a few times over the course of a week. Then if it goes badly the first time, you have a few more chances with it.

ShiroKuro I have a cold, but the moment it is over and I am crossing away on my cross trainer again, I'll play the piano immediately after.

twocats I didn't bomb it but it wasn't ideal either. Then there was another time when I said "Now I'll play I'm in the mood for love" and some old guy in the back yelled out "You bet we are".

Hahahaha! That almost sounds like something out of a Marx movie... you know, capt. Spaulding: "Signor Ravelli's first selection will be 'Somewhere My Love Lies Sleeping' with a male chorus."

ShiroKuro I would think that the thing to do would be to do the “pounding heart” practice more than once, not in the same practice session, but a few times over the course of a week. Then if it goes badly the first time, you have a few more chances with it.

I did it! I could only "cross" for seven minutes because I am not quite recovered from my cold, but I played a piece with pounding heart. Actually, the heart was not a problem at all, I wasn't bothered by it at all, and I breathed freely. But my fingers were shaking and I had a bad memory lapse - just suddenly, no idea what comes next. I'll check that memory lapse later today, to work at that spot.
Maybe next time I should combine the pounding heart from the workout with holding my breath for an even more realistic imitation of mental and physical stress!

After joining a Piano Commons and voicing my concerns that nerves may shorten my lifespan, my teacher explained that playing a piece isn't about me, it all about the music. Once I am comfortable with all the aspects of the piece, I practice incessantly for 2 or 3 weeks. No talking during the performance, ie "Ooops" "Aargh" or favorite cuss word, always get the last chord right, smile when you stand up regardless and remember - its about the music.

Works for me.

pianoloverus I guess when you're dealing with an audience who is likely to be both hard of hearing and suffering from various degrees of dementia, you are performing for them, and it's not really a question of how well you play. I've played music at nursing homes and assisted living facilities, and the audience in general is almost always appreciative.

A not often discussed point is that a piece should be more solid and ingrained in us to be secure enough for a public performance than it needs to be to play it well for ourselves (or a teacher) at tempo. Ideally, I want not to be dependent on muscle memory, but able to play the music in my head end to end and write out the notes at any point from memory.

Unfortunately, that may involve putting a lot more prep time in than I may want to do if just planning to play for myself, family, and friends.

@pseudonym58 and @twocats oh my, those are truly heart attack-inducing occurrences!

@sweelinck definitely the degree to which a piece is polished is also key.

Although last fall, I came to think that another benefit, at least for me, from doing these public performances is just the “hard-fast” deadline aspect of it, that the performance date comes whether I’m as ready as I can be, or not. So another goal I have for myself is to be able to prevent nerves from getting in the way of me doing my best, whatever level of ”my best” happens to be.

Part of how I came to this conclusion is connected to the fact that I have always wanted to record and share pieces I’ve polished, but I never feel like they’re at the “truly polished stage,” so I end up recording only very few of the pieces I work on.

But the recital date rolls around whether I’m ready or not, and my pieces are “close enough” to share. So I’d like to be able to play at that “close enough” level without completely falling apart.

Studying at the university, I have to play regularly on different pianos which I never used before and in different set ups. I simply accept the fact that it will be what it will be. Most of the issues people experience with the piano being different or the light, the bench and all these other factors are essentially just psychological, ie it is not so much the set up in itself but the fear we have that makes us concerned about those differences. Over time I got used to just get at the piano and play within the given set up. There are certainly things that will make me play differently than what I do in my usual home set up but I am not trying to play exactly the same way or at least I accept that it will be different.

@iternabe thanks, I'll take a look!