@twocats congratulations on doing it!
After I write this response, I realized that it was quite long, so hereās the tl;dr version:
- Anticipate āstrange piano settingā nerves
- Adjust to the piano itself
- Play two pieces (if possible)
- Accept the nerves, donāt try to prevent them but just learn to live with them
- Understand what the fight or flight response is, what adrenaline is
- Use exercise to take the edge off of the adrenaline
- Let go of the desire to ānot be nervousā
If these ideas interest you, read on!
I have been working on performance nerves off and on for years, so maybe I can share some of what Iāve learned.
Anticipate āstrange piano settingā nerves
First, you do get better at quickly adjusting to the jolt of āstrange piano setting.ā Even just articulating what throws you off can help. The bench is different, even if you adjusted it, it may not be the right height. Also things in your line of sight may be off. Before we moved (well, before the pandemic actually) I used to go to a regular piano at the home of some friends. They always had a table lamp directly on the music desk of their grand piano, at the far right side. I hated that, but after the first time (which really threw me), I knew it would be there and it bothered me less. Another big thing is whatās in your peripheral vision. We are used to our home piano space, so we no longer notice the furniture, artwork on the wall etc. But in a new space, all that visual noise becomes mental noise thatās distracting. Knowing that this happens can help, and you can also think about it while practicing, in advance of the performance.
So in addition to @Sam ās advice about sitting down and taking a minute to get settled in with the bench, pedals and sheet music, I also recommend looking around a bit and mentally making a note of whatās in your line of sight, so that while youāre playing, youāre less distracted by it.
Adjust to the piano itself
Another thing is the piano itself. If possible, playing it before you actually perform is good. I like to play a scale across a few octaves, play some chords, use the damper pedal, feel the action, listen for any buzzes or creaks so I know theyāre there.
**Play two pieces **
But sometimes pre-playing is not an option. Partly in light of that, my personal preference when performing is to always play at least two pieces, with an easier one first. That does two things. First, obviously, it gives me a chance to get used to the piano, how it sounds and feels. But the other thing, the reason it helps me so much, is it really helps to relieve the pressure, that āyou got one shot to get it rightā pressure. Knowing I have two pieces actually makes both pieces go better, for me anyway.
**Accept the nerves **
Another thing I have learned is that Iām just not going to play at 100% of my ability, so I have to be ok with that. I practice āplaying through,ā and I have a few goals for the performance, like ādonāt stop, play through mistakes and donāt re-play.ā I assume that Iām going to have some nerves, and probably shaky hands, and I choose to accept that rather than try to stop it. So I donāt think āhow can I not be nervous, how can I prevent my hands from shaking?ā Instead, I think, āhow can I do my best, and enjoy myself, despite being nervous, despite having shaky hands?ā I assume that Iām going to have that jolt of nerves, and when it comes, my goal is just to accept it and ignore it. And no matter what, I want to start and finish with a smile.
Understand what āfight or flightā is
Now, having said that, recognizing that Iām going to get nervous and the goal in the moment is just to accept that, I do various things to try to mitigate the nerves. If you, @twocats , truly were just thrown by the strange environment and didnāt have actual performance nerves, this might not be relevant for you, but if you did have performance nerves, understanding the fight or flight response a little can also help. Well, actually, even if the only thing that threw you was the environment and the people there didnāt contribute to your nerves, knowing more about the flight or flight responses might still be relevant.
The fight or flight response is all about adrenaline, so once the fight or flight response kicks on, itās as much a physical thing as a mental thing. Once itās triggered, deep breaths and that kind of thing can help calm it down, but it can be very hard to do that while also playing. For me, understanding that was really helpful, it let me forgive myself, if that makes sense. A surge of adrenaline in your body creates a physical reality, whether itās shaky hands, shallow breathing, sweaty palms, cold arms, feeling of your mind going blank, whatever. All of those things are a response to the adrenaline surge, which is an age-old biological tool that the body keeps on reserve for when itās being chased by a deadly wild animal.
It also helps to remember that adrenaline is a hormone and a professional pianist once explained to me that hormones ebb and flow over the course of a day, and they are a depletable resource, which relates to performing in two ways. 1) during the performance, when people say they get less nervous as the performance goes on, thatās partly because the adrenaline surges and then slowly drains away. In other words, this is different from calming yourself down. Understanding that helped me because it means that even if I donāt do anything to actively try to calm myself down, I will get calmer as the minutes tick by just because the adrenaline will drain away as my body realizes itās not actually being chased by a bear. (This is also another reason for playing more than one piece.)
Use exercise to take the edge off
2) The other way it relates to performing is that if you can do something to deplete some of that adrenaline before the performance, you can blunt it, take the edge off of it. So the other piece of advice I got from that pianist was to try to exercise on the day of the performance, do something, maybe for 20 minutes, something aerobic that gets your heart rate up and your breathing up. She said this actually depletes some of your bodyās ability to mobilize the fight or flight response (just for that day, it will be back the next day), and this is probably the reason behind the experience that people sometimes have of performing better when they were a little tired. My goal is always to get a little out of breath mid-morning or mid-afternoon on the day of a performance, that seems to be the key for me. When Iāve done that, I feel a little less acutely nervous, and it seems like my hands donāt shake as badly.
So, @twocats some of this may not be relevant for you, but maybe there are some helpful ideas here. I really enjoy playing for others, and with others, so I have worked on these details over the years, and I can tell you that it has made a huge difference for me.
Let go of the desire to ānot be nervousā
Lastly, Iāll repeat what to me is the most important point: when you feel nervous, the single best thing to do is just forgive yourself and focus on the music. Let go of the desire to ānot be nervousā and accept that begin nervous is part of it.
š