This is a forum, not a blog, but I made a long post, so if you're upset about long posts, skip this one!
Ok, and here's 1 of 2 of my favorite Radiohead pianist / arrangers (the other is at the end). I have Josh Cohen's Radiohead playbook in my dream horde, and he makes up 1/3 my personal trinity of "non-classical" reasons why I want to learn how to read sheet music and have the skills necessary to play "xyz-mumble-level" music, whatever the heck that even is. I started with film soundtracks like The Man From Snowy River, which, if I work hard I might be able to play next year, then I followed the bouncing ball into kerblam OH NO. Cue video.
Me, kerblammed: "Looks like my dreambook is much more difficult than I expected, so I guess I'm gonna need more skills. Let's see, what kind of skills?" So off I go to research My Dude Josh, and I find this description of his work. I imagine it might look like B.S. It does not look B.S.ssy to me. It looks like starlight.
"Josh Cohen (b. 1984 Auckland, New Zealand) is an Australian composer, pianist and ambient artist based in Berlin known for a unique style that merges jazz and modern classical music, as well as spirited live performances inspired by electronic music sets."
"Cohen’s innovative and improvisational approach to playing conjures all the dynamism of iconic electronic music producers merging it with the rich atmospheres of Impressionist pianists. A unique synthesis of classical and jazz training underscores his sound but it is the sense of space, simplicity and intensity of emotion that have driven over 20 million YouTube views and granted Radiohead’s approval for songbooks featuring Cohen's idiosyncratic arrangements to be released by their publisher Faber Music."
"Okie dokie, little bean, little egg, little bug. So skills, skills, what skills am I gonna need? - It looks like all of them?"
And let me be clear. Do I think I'll ever be able to play Josh Cohen's stuff? You know what, I don't know. Very probably not! But the question is: do I care about attainment, or am I living a dream just having a piano? (It's the 2nd one.) I will strive as hard as I can toward a dream on one hand, while also showing up every day to obsess over my itty bitty kinda dumb sounding arrangement of the Entertainer, on the other. Will this silly piece get me from here to there? Well. I need to practice making slightly bigger jumps in the left hand, so. That's probably one of the 99,999,999 skills one needs to play this arrangement of Paranoid Android. Will playing this piece get me further away? No. It will get me at least one measure closer. Let's play!
Does any of this bother me? No. I get perfect sleep at night playing Alfred 1 badly, with Josh Cohen's playbook sitting in my dragon stash with a little sparkle. It's next to Joe Hisaishi, Ryuichi Sakamoto, Philip Glass, Vince Guaraldi (Charlie Brown Christmas), and Debussy, and various lunatic Beethoven sonatas I will never have the skill to play. There's more chance of life on Mars. More than one person in my orbit has implied or outright said I'm crazy, I'll burn out, I'm arrogant, I'm dumb, I'm delusional. Fine. Cool. But what I'm absolutely not is afraid to fail, afraid to work, afraid to fall short, afraid of embarrassment, afraid of judgement, afraid of crying. I AM afraid of self-sabotage and perfectionism. I'm afraid of bowing my head to the story that I am less than, and that Beautiful Dream is the destroyer. Shoot low to reduce the chance of failing is not my jam. Lemme tell ya, I have already failed stupendously at twelve different big dreams, and I'm still alive and kicking, and now I have a G-d PIANO, and my retirement, for all you can eat practice, as long as I don't injure myself.
I'm not sharing to be special, to boast, blah blah blah. I'm sharing to be one voice in the wilderness to some kid Googling into the night, so they can find one person on the piano boards who is "pro wild and crazy dreams." Because life is complicated, and dreams are not arrogant, they can be a life-affirming, a rational reach toward beauty in an often hard, disappointing daily reality. I touch my piano like it's a lifeboat, but also like a toy, because it is. It can be both.
Everything I just said goes a million times for Christopher O'Riley, even though the chance I will ever play his pieces is even more ludicrous. Will that stop me from wanting, wishing, and striving to at least play around Level 5? No. No, it will not stop me. He will inspire me every day. The dream of playing alt/rock "songs" in his crazy style gives me rainbows of vicarious joy. There is nothing anyone can say that'll convince me dreaming of this music coming from my piano is any more self-destructive than my habit of taking tens of 1000s of photos a year in the hope that one will maybe turn out kinda ok enough to frame. I have the hard drive space, so why the heck not.
Here's Christopher, playing Radiohead. My God.
If you made it to the end of my TEDTalk, thanks! 🤣