Piano Recital Crash & Burn Episode 202506 🔥

navindra · 2025-06-22T04:19:35+00:00

Today I participated in my teacher's annual recital. I played two pieces that I had already recorded for PianoTell, Over the Rainbow & Amazing Grace. Si...

keff

navindra So if I don't quit recitals altogether

I am sorry to read your report navindra and can assure you I have been in exactly the same position. When I crashed and burned I vowed not to play in front of other people ever again and even worse concluded that I didn't have the ability to play piano. I gave up going to an adult class that I had been attending for a number of years.

It wasn't too long before my confidence returned such that I could start private lessons but many years before I realised the benefits of playing to other amateur pianists. There was an opportunity to join a piano group in a neighbouring town and I joined the inaugural meeting playing a piece I had known for over twenty five years. When it came to my turn to play the piano was unfamiliar and my hands were shaking. Half way through I lost my place, paused for a moment and then carried on.

I attended that piano group every month for almost four years and then with the help of a number of friends started a new group in our own town which has been meeting since 2018. (During Covid we moved the meeting online.)

My hands no longer shake when I play to the group but I still make more mistakes than when I play at home. Somehow I don't see all the notes on the page, the tuning of the piano is different or the keys don't give me the same feel. Generally I keep playing after each mistake but often come away thinking I could have done better. I may be annoyed with myself but always go back to the next meeting. IMO it is the only way to improve.

Playing piano is very solitary and taking part in recitals or being part of a piano group is so beneficial in many ways. There are a number of wonderful posts in this thread.

navindra

Nightowl Sophia Thanks for the perspectives... and yes my children have teased me more than a little on this. They don't comprehend how someone could have stage fright.

keff My hands no longer shake when I play to the group but I still make more mistakes than when I play at home. Somehow I don't see all the notes on the page, the tuning of the piano is different or the keys don't give me the same feel. Generally I keep playing after each mistake but often come away thinking I could have done better. I may be annoyed with myself but always go back to the next meeting. IMO it is the only way to improve.

Love this. Thanks for sharing.

rsl12 If you quit piano, what happens to pianotell?? You can't quit!

Thanks so much, and just to clarify, it never crossed my mind to quit piano altogether, it was more the live performance part that I was putting into question!

Jane https://www.beachbunnysoftware.com/music/JosefHofmann-DifferentPlaces.pdf

Thanks so much for sharing this. It's spot on. My first feeling when sitting at the piano in the hall was being disoriented. I looked at the keyboard and it didn't feel right... my height was too low, the music was too high, the keyboard wasn't centered, and I was using different glasses than I usually use at home!

It all sounds like excuses but that book helps put this in context for me.

rsl12

Nightowl One last thing - I must admit to being a complete coward when it comes to any kind of performing and I've never even tried to overcome it (apart from the online recitals, but apart from red button syndrome there's no real pressure). So, kudos to anyone who tries it.

I remember how hard that first pianotell recital was for you. Comparing yourself to others, you expressed a lot of inadequacy. I think you're in the best position to empathize with Navindra. I'm glad you found a way to enjoy the recitals!

rsl12

navindra

I hope one bad performance doesn't discourage you that much! I have three thoughts:

Think of the most disasterous recital performance you have ever heard. What emotions did you feel for the performer? My guess is you felt sympathy and understanding. And most likely that's what most people felt listening to your performance. Certainly they weren't thinking, "what a public disgrace!" So be generous in your thoughts about yourself and your audience.
A live performance is like a single roll at roulette. The odds of a perfect performance are basically 0, and it's easy for mistakes in music to derail us. As others have mentioned, crashing and burning is perfectly normal! But also, there is a skill associated with managing mistakes, and the perhaps with all the practice you have done, you never really practiced that. Some people here have given good ideas of how to handle it, and I'd talk to your teacher about focusing on that aspect.
If you quit piano, what happens to pianotell?? You can't quit!

pianoloverus

I don't see much discussion on this thread of why people think they get extremely nervous. I think one has to understand that in order to get over that problem or at least minimize it.

ShiroKuro

pianoloverus
I think one has to understand that in order to get over that problem or at least minimize it.

This might help some people. And certainly just understanding can help put it into perspective. And I think it helps with recognizing one’s limitations and accepting that.

But articulating the “why” hasn’t really helped me minimize it. Other things have helped minimize it, but not “understanding” why.

Again, this is just me though…

Jane

I've previously posted these comments from Josef Hofmann on the challenges of performing in non-familiar places, but I think it's worth posting again.

https://www.beachbunnysoftware.com/music/JosefHofmann-DifferentPlaces.pdf

From his book:
https://www.amazon.com/Piano-Playing-Questions-Answered-ebook/dp/B007NC39OW/

Ornstein

Jane Hofmann's writing is so real. I had one of my best performances up until an eyelash fell and landed right on a white key (ie a discoloration of the ivory of the key). Distractions like this and even the subtle physical differences of the room (audience movement in peripheral vision, or even the tiny sounds of shoes moving) are all deviations from our memory.

Changes in key weight vs the usual practice instrument, different tone color or sound, are also differences.
Even different amount of layers, playing in dress shoes vs socks, that's a different sensation, having to play in a suit is at least somewhat of a disadvantage to just wearing a shirt. Maybe pedal maintenance was off so you shouldn't even pedal, but the foot is also part of this muscle memory you've drilled and put in a lot of time on, and now you're trying to not use it.

Or technician didn't catch a clicking on a key, or the person playing before you dislodged the felt or bushing and now you have to not get distracted by this clicking noise. It could be the most played note in the entire piece. This happened to me in a record session and it took me several tries concentrating really hard to block it out.

If there are too many changes at one time it can get way scarier, real fast, than the occasion has any right to be.

L-M

navindra
Thank you for sharing your experience so honestly. First of all, please don’t be too hard on yourself — stage fright is something many musicians, even professionals, struggle with. The fact that you can play beautifully at home and impress your teacher already shows how much skill and dedication you have. Live performance is a different beast altogether, and it takes time, patience, and practice beyond just the notes.

What you’re feeling is completely normal, and every musician faces setbacks like this at some point. The important part is that you’ve identified some actionable steps, like trying MG’s methods and seeking more performance opportunities. Those are powerful moves in the right direction.

Keep playing, keep learning, and most importantly, be kind to yourself. You’re doing better than you think, and those future recitals will be moments you’ll look back on with pride.

pseudonym58

I know this will probably be a minority opinion here, but having experienced a couple of C&B episodes myself over my lifetime, I would suggest the following:
If you feel you have truly adequately prepared for the recital, and you are able to perform the piece reasonably well when you're not under pressure, consider a very low dose of propranolol (beta blocker) before your recital. That way you can have the experience of performing reasonably well under your belt, so to speak. You will know that you are capable of doing it, and at some point you can reduce the use of propanolol or eliminate it altogether.
Looking at other methods, sometimes you can approximate the stress of performance up to a point by recording yourself as if you were performing, that is to say with no stops and starts and restarts allowed.

HeartKeys

I echo practically all the sentiments expressed above, and meanwhile (in addition to the empathy and encouragement), would suggest to consider actually doing more recitals. Playing under stress/pressure itself is quite a skill, and very very different than practicing by ourselves.

I think a quote (paraphrased) is "courage is doing it scared, but doing it anyway" - reminds me of folks (99% of us) who get adrenaline when speaking publicly, or in this case, doing a recital in front of others.

So after reading all the great contributions above; and doing an honest but graceful self-reflection, getting back to the piano, and practicing, and then also performing in front of others. I reckon that's the only way to get better at... performing in front of others! 🙂

ShiroKuro

HeartKeys to consider actually doing more recitals

This has been my aim, but the problem isn’t just the number of recitals, but the frequency/regularity. And the bigger problem is that, esp for adults, it’s harder to get (and/or create) recital opportunities than one might expect.

One recital once or twice a year isn’t frequent enough, least in my case. And I’ve been playing for a very long time, so I’ve played in a lot of recitals, but they’ve been stretched out over years. And then there was a big dry spell during the pandemic years.

But on the rare occasions when I have more frequent performances, it absolutely helps.

Ideal IMO would be once a month. But I have never found a way to make that happen. And not for lack of trying!

Nevertheless, performing more is good advice!

keff

ShiroKuro But I have never found a way to make that happen.

Hello ShiroKuro, have you considered the possibility of a live online recital such as one using Zoom? Some of forum members may be interested to take part but I can imagine different time zones might be a problem.

thepianoplayer416

I come from a non-musical family. A number of people in the family circle took lessons. Few would admit they took music lessons so they wouldn't be asked to play something.

Last Sunday I was in a shopping mall playing a public piano. The piano was provided by iMus Academy who offers lessons for kids from low-income families. Throughout the day people would sit at the piano practicing their pieces for up to an hour at a time. The upright was at a corner of the mall near an elevator. Even with people walking by, the person playing would stay focused and ignore the crowd. People came with music on a phone or tablet. After more than half an hour wait, I setup the camera and made recordings of a piece that was less than a minute. Did several retakes. I noticed that as I repeated the piece several times, my playing went faster & faster so kept an earlier take.

Practicing on a public piano is a good idea. You're not in a recital. People didn't come specifically to watch you perform. On the other hand, you get used to playing with people around in order to overcome the anxiety of being in front of an audience. Some people who are shopping & dining would walk by ignoring the music while others would stop and watch.

TC3

keff That's a good idea. I think there's a Discord piano group that does just that.

ShiroKuro

keff have you considered the possibility of a live online recital such as one using Zoom?

I actually did that a few times during the pandemic. I don’t really like it because I just don’t like zoom … 😅 probably because I had to teach online during zoom and I absolutely hated it.

But the other thing is that, I have found that I just do not get the full-on shakes when I play my own piano. I get them a little bit, but even when I had a big party at my house and played for 20 people, bc it was my house, my piano, my schedule… the degree of stage fright is seriously reduced.

But don’t get me wrong, I have found those performances (i.e. at my house but in front of an audience) to be really good for “practicing performance,” so I do try to do that as often as I can. And that’s the one kind of performance opportunity that I can actually create. But for me at least, it’s not enough to truly learn how to manage and play through the shakes.

I’ve written about this before but I find that it is close to impossible to recreate the “recital shakes” in anything other than a real recital. So just based on my own experience, the core elements that bring on the shakes are: an unfamiliar piano, a formal timeline and program, a big space with lots of people I don’t know…

keff

TC3 Thanks for the reply TC3 and for alerting me to the Discord group. It occurred after making the suggestion that it would be useful to discuss tips for alleviating performance nerves in addition to listening to anyone wishing to have a go at playing.

thepianoplayer416

I like the idea of a Zoom recital. However, it depends on a computer with good video & sound. Otherwise would take away the enjoyment of the performance.

keff

thepianoplayer416 Thank you. At one time Zoom was quite poor for transmitting music but I was under the impression that it was improved some years ago.

TC3

keff I checked out that Discord group a long time ago, but I haven't been on it since then. I'm guessing it's still around, but who knows. They had recitals, but also "practice rooms" where you were basically doing the public piano practicing that @thepianoplayer416 mentions, just online. I recall that they had technical advice about settings for your AV devices to make them stream steadily, sound as good as possible, etc.

keff

TC3 If there is sufficient interest I would be willing to propose an online meeting, seek the participation and try to find a convenient time. Alternatively I would be happy if another organiser wishes to step forward. Ideally the organiser needs a full Zoom licence rather than the freebie that I use.

pseudonym58

Music over Zoom reminds me of the unfortunate period during the pandemic when I couldn't teach any of my cello students. We had to attempt Zoom lessons, and on the one hand, if the connection was reliable, it was just barely acceptable. On the other hand, some unfortunate students had less than reliable Wi-Fi or experienced other equipment problems. Sometimes not only was the sound atrocious, but the video would sometimes freeze and the audio would get way ahead. Then all of a sudden the video would catch up by speeding up dramatically. It was bizarre and disheartening. However during the pandemic it was better than nothing and I think the students appreciated it for the most part.

keff

pseudonym58 At the start of Covid I also found Zoom to be unacceptable for music. However towards the end of the pandemic I did have some piano lessons using Zoom which I thought went better but this could have been due to a relatively short distance between me and my teacher. If this suggestion gathers pace a test will be required.

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